Now you can smell like a war leader! The U.S. Army has licensed its first cologne, “Patton,” named after World War II leader Gen. George S. Patton.
Scent-maker Parfumologie — a company that has developed perfumes for Jersey Shore’s Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino and Mariah Carey — is manufacturing the product. The Army icon apparently is best captured by “a blend of lavender, citrus, coconut, cedar, sage, tonka bean, bergamot and lime.” A portion of the profits from “Patton” sales will be donated to the Veterans Administration, according to the maker.
“Do you want to smell like a man? I SAID, DO YOU WANT TO SMELL LIKE A MAN???”
Col. Kilgore wants to know when ‘Victory: A Scent for the Morning’ will be out. Smells like gasoline and dead children.
100 things that you did not know about Africa - Nos.1 - 25
1. The human race is of African origin. The oldest known skeletal remains of anatomically modern humans (or homo sapiens) were excavated at sites in East Africa. Human remains were discovered at Omo in Ethiopia that were dated at 195,000 years old, the oldest known in the world.
2. Skeletons of pre-humans have been found in Africa that date back between 4 and 5 million years. The oldest known ancestral type of humanity is thought to have been the australopithecus ramidus, who lived at least 4.4 million years ago.
3. Africans were the first to organise fishing expeditions 90,000 years ago. At Katanda, a region in northeastern Zaïre (now Congo), was recovered a finely wrought series of harpoon points, all elaborately polished and barbed. Also uncovered was a tool, equally well crafted, believed to be a dagger. The discoveries suggested the existence of an early aquatic or fishing based culture.
4. Africans were the first to engage in mining 43,000 years ago. In 1964 a hematite mine was found in Swaziland at Bomvu Ridge in the Ngwenya mountain range. Ultimately 300,000 artefacts were recovered including thousands of stone-made mining tools. Adrian Boshier, one of the archaeologists on the site, dated the mine to a staggering 43,200 years old.
5. Africans pioneered basic arithmetic 25,000 years ago. The Ishango bone is a tool handle with notches carved into it found in the Ishango region of Zaïre (now called Congo) near Lake Edward. The bone tool was originally thought to have been over 8,000 years old, but a more sensitive recent dating has given dates of 25,000 years old. On the tool are 3 rows of notches. Row 1 shows three notches carved next to six, four carved next to eight, ten carved next to two fives and finally a seven. The 3 and 6, 4 and 8, and 10 and 5, represent the process of doubling. Row 2 shows eleven notches carved next to twenty-one notches, and nineteen notches carved next to nine notches. This represents 10 + 1, 20 + 1, 20 - 1 and 10 - 1. Finally, Row 3 shows eleven notches, thirteen notches, seventeen notches and nineteen notches. 11, 13, 17 and 19 are the prime numbers between 10 and 20.
6. Africans cultivated crops 12,000 years ago, the first known advances in agriculture. Professor Fred Wendorf discovered that people in Egypt’s Western Desert cultivated crops of barley, capers, chick-peas, dates, legumes, lentils and wheat. Their ancient tools were also recovered. There were grindstones, milling stones, cutting blades, hide scrapers, engraving burins, and mortars and pestles.
7. Africans mummified their dead 9,000 years ago. A mummified infant was found under the Uan Muhuggiag rock shelter in south western Libya. The infant was buried in the foetal position and was mummified using a very sophisticated technique that must have taken hundreds of years to evolve. The technique predates the earliest mummies known in Ancient Egypt by at least 1,000 years. Carbon dating is controversial but the mummy may date from 7438 (±220) BC.
8. Africans carved the world’s first colossal sculpture 7,000 or more years ago. The Great Sphinx of Giza was fashioned with the head of a man combined with the body of a lion. A key and important question raised by this monument was: How old is it? In October 1991 Professor Robert Schoch, a geologist from Boston University, demonstrated that the Sphinx was sculpted between 5000 BC and 7000 BC, dates that he considered conservative.
9. On the 1 March 1979, the New York Times carried an article on its front page also page sixteen that was entitled Nubian Monarchy called Oldest. In this article we were assured that: “Evidence of the oldest recognizable monarchy in human history, preceding the rise of the earliest Egyptian kings by several generations, has been discovered in artifacts from ancient Nubia” (i.e. the territory of the northern Sudan and the southern portion of modern Egypt.)
10. The ancient Egyptians had the same type of tropically adapted skeletal proportions as modern Black Africans. A 2003 paper appeared in American Journal of Physical Anthropology by Dr Sonia Zakrzewski entitled Variation in Ancient Egyptian Stature and Body Proportions where she states that: “The raw values in Table 6 suggest that Egyptians had the ‘super-Negroid’ body plan described by Robins (1983). The values for the brachial and crural indices show that the distal segments of each limb are longer relative to the proximal segments than in many ‘African’ populations.”
11. The ancient Egyptians had Afro combs. One writer tells us that the Egyptians “manufactured a very striking range of combs in ivory: the shape of these is distinctly African and is like the combs used even today by Africans and those of African descent.”
12. The Funerary Complex in the ancient Egyptian city of Saqqara is the oldest building that tourists regularly visit today. An outer wall, now mostly in ruins, surrounded the whole structure. Through the entrance are a series of columns, the first stone-built columns known to historians. The North House also has ornamental columns built into the walls that have papyrus-like capitals. Also inside the complex is the Ceremonial Court, made of limestone blocks that have been quarried and then shaped. In the centre of the complex is the Step Pyramid, the first of 90 Egyptian pyramids.
13. The first Great Pyramid of Giza, the most extraordinary building in history, was a staggering 481 feet tall - the equivalent of a 40-storey building. It was made of 2.3 million blocks of limestone and granite, some weighing 100 tons.
14. The ancient Egyptian city of Kahun was the world’s first planned city. Rectangular and walled, the city was divided into two parts. One part housed the wealthier inhabitants – the scribes, officials and foremen. The other part housed the ordinary people. The streets of the western section in particular, were straight, laid out on a grid, and crossed each other at right angles. A stone gutter, over half a metre wide, ran down the centre of every street.
15. Egyptian mansions were discovered in Kahun - each boasting 70 rooms, divided into four sections or quarters. There was a master’s quarter, quarters for women and servants, quarters for offices and finally, quarters for granaries, each facing a central courtyard. The master’s quarters had an open court with a stone water tank for bathing. Surrounding this was a colonnade.
16 The Labyrinth in the Egyptian city of Hawara with its massive layout, multiple courtyards, chambers and halls, was the very largest building in antiquity. Boasting three thousand rooms, 1,500 of them were above ground and the other 1,500 were underground.
17. Toilets and sewerage systems existed in ancient Egypt. One of the pharaohs built a city now known as Amarna. An American urban planner noted that: “Great importance was attached to cleanliness in Amarna as in other Egyptian cities. Toilets and sewers were in use to dispose waste. Soap was made for washing the body. Perfumes and essences were popular against body odour. A solution of natron was used to keep insects from houses … Amarna may have been the first planned ‘garden city’.”
18. Sudan has more pyramids than any other country on earth - even more than Egypt. There are at least 223 pyramids in the Sudanese cities of Al Kurru, Nuri, Gebel Barkal and Meroë. They are generally 20 to 30 metres high and steep sided.
19. The Sudanese city of Meroë is rich in surviving monuments. Becoming the capital of the Kushite Empire between 590 BC until AD 350, there are 84 pyramids in this city alone, many built with their own miniature temple. In addition, there are ruins of a bath house sharing affinities with those of the Romans. Its central feature is a large pool approached by a flight of steps with waterspouts decorated with lion heads.
20. Bling culture has a long and interesting history. Gold was used to decorate ancient Sudanese temples. One writer reported that: “Recent excavations at Meroe and Mussawwarat es-Sufra revealed temples with walls and statues covered with gold leaf”.
21. In around 300 BC, the Sudanese invented a writing script that had twenty-three letters of which four were vowels and there was also a word divider. Hundreds of ancient texts have survived that were in this script. Some are on display in the British Museum.
22. In central Nigeria, West Africa’s oldest civilisation flourished between 1000 BC and 300 BC. Discovered in 1928, the ancient culture was called the Nok Civilisation, named after the village in which the early artefacts were discovered. Two modern scholars, declare that “[a]fter calibration, the period of Nok art spans from 1000 BC until 300 BC”. The site itself is much older going back as early as 4580 or 4290 BC.
23. West Africans built in stone by 1100 BC. In the Tichitt-Walata region of Mauritania, archaeologists have found “large stone masonry villages” that date back to 1100 BC. The villages consisted of roughly circular compounds connected by “well-defined streets”.
24. By 250 BC, the foundations of West Africa’s oldest cities were established such as Old Djenné in Mali.
25. Kumbi Saleh, the capital of Ancient Ghana, flourished from 300 to 1240 AD. Located in modern day Mauritania, archaeological excavations have revealed houses, almost habitable today, for want of renovation and several storeys high. They had underground rooms, staircases and connecting halls. Some had nine rooms. One part of the city alone is estimated to have housed 30,000 people.
By Robin Walker
I love this stuff. It was not until reading The Poisonwood Bible that I had any idea about any of this. But yes, Africa was on the cutting edge of civilization before the white people came and fucked that shit up. I love how people of European descent think they invented everything. And I am a person of European descent. I think these posts are extremely important and should be read by all. Educate your asses.
My favorite thing is that Europeans and their descendants somewhere along the line decided that Egyptians aren’t really, know … African. They’re like, you know, white-ish. Certainly not the cradle of Greek and Roman religions, mythologies, folklores, wine and beer-making, medical and legal professions, philosophies, or cuisines.
And best of all, Egypt is now … Semitic? I’m not saying Egyptians are not a great melting pot of Africans, Arabs, Semitic peoples in general, but um … IT’S STILL FREAKING AFRICA.
Doesn’t anyone study history? Charles Sumner, probably the greatest Senator from Massachusetts, was nearly murdered on the Senate floor by Representative Preston Brooks of South Carolina, who attacked Sumner with a cane in retaliation for Sumner’s 3 hour long diatribe against the spread of slavery into Kansas and Brooks’ cousin, Senator Andrew Butler of SC, in particular. Brooks bludgeoned Sumner while Sumner was at his desk—unarmed—while Rep. Lawrence Keitt kept would be rescuers away from Sumner with a pistol. Sumner ripped apart the desk that had been bolted to the Senate floor in his efforts to defend himself.
After the attack, Brooks was sent dozens of canes to replace the one he broke on Sumner’s head, and the race towards Secession was begun in earnest.
Sumner’s convalescence took three years. He returned to the Senate in 1861, and was the leader of the Radical Republicans who tried, ultimately unsuccessfully, to protect the rights of the Freedmen, and he lost nearly all of his political clout through the corruption of the Grant administration. Without Sumner, Jim Crow took root throughout the old Confederacy.
Herman Cain, you are out of your depth.
Gingrich’s comments about child labor laws have occupied my mind all day. Gingrich is repugnant.
Lewis Hine, one of the finest American photographers of labor, lost his reputation and career, dying in poverty and obscurity, because he dared photograph children at work and suggest that such labor was abhorrent. Hine snuck into factories, mills, farmlands, tanneries, canning facilities, etc. all over America—the Titans of Labor wanted him dead and worked to discredit him and his work.
These are some of Hine’s best known pictures of children at work. Addie, the girl at the loom, was 11. The boys standing on the looms, like Addie, were usually barefoot because it was felt that they got better footing on the looms. Tetanus was a real danger. As was the loss of fingers, hands, arms, etc.
The ‘breaker boys’ worked in mines throughout Appalachia to remove impurities from coal—it was back breaking work that was highly dangerous—fingers were often lost, and the boys often got their feet in the door to move into mining jobs as they got older and stronger. Black lung of course resulted.
I’d say that Gingrich should be ashamed of himself, but of course, he is incapable of shame.
I have given up on the Mongoliad until the paper version comes out, so I can’t discuss whether Stephenson et al addressed this, but I find it fascinating to see historians getting to the heart of human experience in a world as romanticized as the Medieval Knights.
As Gen. Sherman said, war is all hell.
h/t Andrew Sullivan
Got a reprint of the History of the First Connecticut Heavy Artillery by John Taylor and Samuel Proal Hatfield from 1893 today. It is glorious. Full of reprints of field reports, pictures, graphs and charts of what cannon, gun, mortar, and other field pieces were fired and how much ammunition spent.
It ends with a directory of all members of the unit as well as all the officers’ promotions.
My Brevet Captain is a minor player in this ‘play,’ but I’m mighty proud to have this record of his contribution to his adopted country.